![]() |
Coaching Information |
|
|
Attention! Thought Crossing! - Or, The Secret of What's Between Your Ears
What are you thinking - right now? 'I'm reading your article!' you say. Well, take a little bit of a closer look. What's spinning in the back of your mind? Is it that big deadline that's looming at the end of the week? Or how you're going to deal with your mother-in-law this weekend? Or maybe you're worrying about your finances? Are you even aware of the thoughts going through your head right now? What about... now? Some Bad News From the Thought Police Scientists estimate that an average person will think at a rate of roughly between 1 and 4 thoughts per second while awake. That's well over 60,000 thoughts during a typical day! And, of all this jabbering going on in your head, it's estimated that you've thought over 95% of your thoughts before. So, not only is your mind generally on a constant hamster wheel, but it's also doing this spinning continuously, unproductively - and unoriginally. The Power Between Your Ears - It's Not What You Think Enough bad news? Ok - now here's the other side of the story. You have within you the greatest, simplest, and most powerful tool imaginable. It can lead you to great prosperity, joy, and fulfillment - or it can drop you instantly into the depths of despair and negativity. No, I'm not talking simply about the power of thought - not even a fraction of those thousands of stale, repeat thoughts running through your head right now will be of much use to you. (Trust me; nope, not even the one wondering for the tenth time whether you turned the stove off this morning). But what is powerful is where you put your attention within all this clatter. Mr. Webster Says: 'Attention: Concentration of the mental powers; a close or careful observing or listening'. So how does that apply to you? 'Concentration of the mental powers' - all too often, we give away the concentration part of our attention to things utterly undeserving. Thoughts of worry, negative predictions, minor irritations, and daily minutiae are hardly productive, and take up too much room in your head. And this leaves very little space for the second, critical, aspect of attention: 'a close or careful observing or listening'. We, as a culture, don't like to sit back and listen. We prefer to be constantly inundated with forceful messages which grab our attention and don't let go. We too often forget to sit back and actually listen to the small voice of intuition. You know, the one that already has the answers that we're trying so hard to figure out. Try It Now Give it a shot. Really. Stop for a minute, and focus actively on your thoughts - concentrate. What are you thinking? You know, that quiet and incessant little buzz behind your eyes; that unsettled feeling - what's behind that? Now shift your attention to listening, see if there's a message waiting for you. Just below the surface, what is it saying? Listen... You're now learning to distinguish the noise of your mind from the voice of your intuition, your inner knowing - all through the tool of attention. You Are Not Your Thoughts There's huge power in putting your attention actively on your thoughts. This helps you to separate the you from the thought. You are not your thoughts, you are having thoughts, they are passing through your head. You are bigger than your thoughts, and you can choose whether or not you want to give them power. And you do this by either giving them your attention, or by allowing them to just float on by. Head and Heart And it's not just thoughts that you can focus your attention on. As cognitive psychologists and holistic healers have known for years, emotions and thoughts are deeply intertwined. One influences the other, and both influence your physical biochemistry. So learning to actively focus your attention on the thoughts and feelings you want, while letting go of those you don't want, could be the best thing you'll ever do for your health, your well being, and your happiness. Oy Vey 'Great', you may say. 'But it isn't so easy to catch my thoughts and feelings, or to do something about them. I don't even know how I feel half of the time, and the thoughts go by so quickly!' Fear not - here's are a few simple exercises. Use Your Words One way to 'catch' your fleeting thoughts and feelings and to focus your attention on them is to 'use your words'. Just like a parent may tell an unruly and whining child who is about to pick a fight to 'use your words' to explain what's bothering him, so can you gently nudge yourself to discipline. This may seem silly, but it's remarkably powerful. Write down or speak out loud (or into a tape recorder) exactly what the thoughts and feelings are. Articulating them clearly gives them shape and focus, and allows you much more freedom to act in a way that supports your growth. Thanks For Sharing Now, as for how to manage the spinning and repeating thoughts, here's a very simple and effective trick. Just like a parent knows not to take everything their child says too seriously, you can also learn to distinguish helpful thoughts and feelings from destructive ones. You can simply tell your thinker - 'thanks for sharing. I will take your comments under advisement. Now, please move along'. So What? So how does all this relate to helping you find 'what's next', or guiding you to 'a you-er you'? Very directly, actually. If you practice putting your direct attention on the jabbering of your mind, articulating those slippery thoughts, and consciously and purposefully telling them 'thanks for sharing!' and then purposefully re-focusing your attention where YOU choose, you will begin to create the space for your true inner voice to come through. Plant the Seeds: Now it's your turn. Take a couple of minutes and try these exercises. Really. Try it now. You never know - hey, what's next...? 1. Practice noticing your thoughts. Try the exercise in the 'Try it Now' section above. Really. 2. Use your words. Get over feeling silly, and actually write down what your thoughts are. Try speaking, try using a tape recorder. Experiment. Notice which thoughts show up over and over. Note your top 5 - make friends with them, and thank them profusely for sharing. And remember - attention is power. What thoughts are you giving your power to? 3. Choose consciously. Once you become aware of the thoughts going through your head, you can begin to make choices. For example: 'Hm, I've been thinking a lot about how unhappy I am in my job. Thanks for sharing. Duly noted. I think I'll choose to focus my attention elsewhere right now, thanks.' P.S. So - what are you thinking... now? As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts, comments, and insights. Drop me a line at mailto:in@heyWhatsNext.com. © 2004 Inna Nirenburg About The Author Inna Nirenburg is a powerful life coach and workshop leader. She uses her deep wisdom and intuition, as well as a concrete actionable process, to help you answer the question 'What's Next?' in all areas of your life. See http://www.heyWhatsNext.com for more information, or to subscribe to her monthly newsletter, 'Inklings: Your Guide to a You-er You'.
MORE RESOURCES:
Coaching - Google News |
RELATED ARTICLES
Business Coaching - Ten Ways of Dealing with Mistakes You Made You can either choose to dwell on what happened and get stuck in the past or you can choose to start using your energy to build your future. Either choice is okay. How to Hire a Coach Improve Your Life! How to Hire A Coach.A reader writes, "I do not know how or where to contact a coach here. What The Buddha Says About Coaches There is a Buddhist saying that goes like this: "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill it." This means to kill any concept of the Buddha as something apart from oneself. Truth About Life Coaching School Accreditation With life coaching becoming "the" career choice in this millennium, many of you are seeking the right choice for training and certification. Hopefully this article will answer some of your questions. Every Obstacle Always Presents an Opportunity In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Two Pillows and One Dead Husband That's what I needed when I delved deeply into my first acting class. I was 60 years old and had a lifetime of experiences behind me but anger or rather the act of reacting to it was not in my skill set. Theres Always Enough Time! I thought I'd begin this article by stimulating your mind with a little time trivia contest! Are you ready? Alright then, here goes?.. A Visualization Exercise on Managing Expectations for Adults with ADD As adults with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), we often find ourselves excited by new ideas and plans, but overwhelmed by what it will take to reach the goals.Many of my coaching clients find themselves in this situation. Do You See Clearly? "I don't see how I can just make up my mind to be happy and successful; and suddenly, magically, I will be. That seems to me to be a denial of my reality. Guilt By Association & Wealth By It Too! "Tell me what company thou keepst, and I'll tell thee what thou art." - Miguel de Cervantes (1547 - 1616) Spanish novelist. Think, Pause & Talk There are two kinds of peoples we generally face in every walk of life1] who talks negative and excessive and2] who talks whenever required or talks right and right time.But in reality we get attracted towards person who talks negative and excessive, it gives us fun and tax-free entertainment and we get fascinated and influenced by such activities. New Developments Make Christian Life Coaching "The" Career Choice for Work-At-Home Professionals I have watched for a couple years now, as my wife's career has really taken off and I must admit, I am impressed. At the age of 55, having had so many life experiences, it just made me sit up and take notice that something huge is happening. Top Ten Tips for Living Authentically 1. Know your purposeAre you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your truth north every time. Personal Life Coaching And How It Can Help You Coaching is an effective process used to support individuals in creating something new for themselves. I work side by side with my clients' coaching them by providing perspective and support for self-knowledge as they accomplish their business and personal goals. The Incredible Rightness of Being An Age-Old QuestionSearching for more meaning in our lives has been an age-old preoccupation for us humans. Why am I here? What am I meant to do? What's the point of it all? And, most importantly in the modern-day world, what is it that will make me happy?Dissatisfaction, or "Gimme More!"It is human nature that when we feel dissatisfied with something - be it our jobs, our homes, our relationships, or even our lives in general - we feel there is something missing. Skills for Change The name of the game is CHANGE -- that's true at work, and it's also true in life. In both situations there are FOUR skills you can trust:1. 5 Tips to Improve ANY Performance Seeking improved performance at work? Wishing you could finally achieve your sports-related goals? Merely looking for a way to get more out of everything you do? What follows are five basic skills (basic in that all top achievers know these skills and apply them in some form on a weekly basis) that will dramatically improve your performance.1. The Mid-Life Challenge: Make a Plan to Re-ignite Vocational Passion Nobody will stop you in the hallway at work to ask if your career provides meaning and personal fulfillment. Recognizing that something's missing in your vocational life and taking the initiative to change must come from within. HR Professional in New Avtaar: HR as a Coach and Mentor IntroductionThese days in corporate sector, everybody is talking about the role of HR professional as a coach and mentor. People are exited as well as confused. Poise, Posture, and Performance Good posture is seen to have many advantages. From an aesthetic point of view it can enhance image, sending out the right signals (body language). |
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |